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*** Official Celebrity Death Match Thread 2025 ***

1,683 Views | 34 Replies | Last: 1 mo ago by CC09LawAg
THE_CHOSEN_ONE
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9:36a, 10/14/25
Rules are simple, post two celebrities, and Texags will decide who would win a fight to the death.

I'll start:
Bradley Cooper vs Chris Pratt
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Hwy30East
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10:03a, 10/14/25
Bradley Cooper

Matt Damon vs Keanu Reeves
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Brian Earl Spilner
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10:24a, 10/14/25
AG
Keanu

Michael Cera vs Elliot Page
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Ryan the Temp
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In reply to Brian Earl Spilner • 10:28a, 10/14/25
AG
Elliot Page

Jane Fonda vs. Susan Sarandon
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THE_CHOSEN_ONE
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In reply to Hwy30East • 10:31a, 10/14/25
I'd give Damon the slight edge due to age
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THE_CHOSEN_ONE
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In reply to Ryan the Temp • 10:31a, 10/14/25
Sarandon

Michael Jackson vs Prince
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Wolfpac 08
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In reply to THE_CHOSEN_ONE • 10:40a, 10/14/25
AG
Prince

Michael Jackson vs Makuly Culkin
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THE_CHOSEN_ONE
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11:11a, 10/14/25
MJ

Matthew Mconaughey vs Woody Harrelson
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Wolfpac 08
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In reply to THE_CHOSEN_ONE • 11:16a, 10/14/25
AG
Woody. He's got that east Texas meth white trash in him.

Mike Elko vs Jack Black
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THE_CHOSEN_ONE
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In reply to Wolfpac 08 • 11:19a, 10/14/25
Elko, it would be a massacre

Dabo Swinney vs Urban Meyer
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Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy
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In reply to THE_CHOSEN_ONE • 11:28a, 10/14/25
AG
THE_CHOSEN_ONE said:
Elko, it would be a massacre

Dabo Swinney vs Urban Meyer

Trick question.

Urban would be too busy chasing coeds.
In Hoc Signo Vinces
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Wolfpac 08
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In reply to THE_CHOSEN_ONE • 11:32a, 10/14/25
AG
Urban. He'd pull a foreign object out of his trunks.

Bob Vila vs Al Borland in a Tables, Ladders, and Chairs match
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Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy
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In reply to Wolfpac 08 • 11:45a, 10/14/25
AG
Al Borland.

USA Hulk Hogan vs. NWO Hulk Hogan
In Hoc Signo Vinces
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BBRex
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11:48a, 10/14/25
AG
D'Angelo has bitten the d'ust.
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Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy
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In reply to BBRex • 11:51a, 10/14/25
AG
BBRex said:
D'Angelo has bitten the d'ust.

huh?
In Hoc Signo Vinces
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Wolfpac 08
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In reply to BBRex • 12:02p, 10/14/25
AG
BBRex said:
D'Angelo has bitten the d'ust.

Sir, this is the death match thread…you're looking for the death watch thread..

Unless you want to put D'Angelo vs Eazy E or something?
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Ryan the Temp
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In reply to Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy • 12:03p, 10/14/25
AG
Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy said:
BBRex said:
D'Angelo has bitten the d'ust.

huh?

D'Angelo vs. Pancreatic Cancer

Quote:
d'ust

Well played.
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Wolfpac 08
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In reply to Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy • 12:04p, 10/14/25
AG
USA Hulk (pre-nwo) bc Hogan must pose, pal.

Mary Kate vs Ashley vs Elizabeth Olsen - Triple Threat match
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Wolfpac 08
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In reply to Ryan the Temp • 12:05p, 10/14/25
AG
Ryan the Temp said:
D'Angelo vs. Pancreatic Cancer

Asked and answered
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BBRex
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In reply to Wolfpac 08 • 12:12p, 10/14/25
AG
Dammit, you're right. But, for the record, his final opponent is undefeated.
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Brian Earl Spilner
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In reply to THE_CHOSEN_ONE • 12:30p, 10/14/25
AG
THE_CHOSEN_ONE said:
I'd give Damon the slight edge due to age

I go Keanu based on the quick cuts and shaky cam of the Bourne series vs the long, steady takes of the John Wick series.
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Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy
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12:54p, 10/14/25
AG
Who else breathed a sigh of relieve when they realized it wasn't Beverly????

Sorry not sorry. She's freaking hawt!!!!
In Hoc Signo Vinces
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Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy
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In reply to BBRex • 12:55p, 10/14/25
AG
BBRex said:
Dammit, you're right. But, for the record, his final opponent is undefeated.

His finally opponent was *****?
In Hoc Signo Vinces
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Hwy30East
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In reply to THE_CHOSEN_ONE • 3:03p, 10/14/25
THE_CHOSEN_ONE said:
I'd give Damon the slight edge due to age


I give Damon/Bourne the edge in hand to hand combat over Wick.

James Gandolfini vs Bryan Cranston


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THE_CHOSEN_ONE
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In reply to Hwy30East • 3:29p, 10/14/25
Gandolfini

Sidney Sweeney vs Alexandra Daddario
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Wolfpac 08
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In reply to THE_CHOSEN_ONE • 3:48p, 10/14/25
AG
Don't care as long as late-90s Vince McMahon books it and I get to watch

Steve Urkel vs Screech Powers
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Duffel Pud
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3:58p, 10/14/25
Steve Urkel, because he DID do that

Alec Baldwin vs Stephen Baldwin
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Hwy30East
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5:11p, 10/14/25
Stephen Baldwin

Farrah Fawcett vs Cheryl Ladd
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YokelRidesAgain
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9:59p, 10/14/25
AG
Farrah

Hillary Clinton vs. Bill Clinton
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Wolfpac 08
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In reply to YokelRidesAgain • 1:58a, 10/15/25
AG
Hillary.

Hillary Clinton vs Michelle Obama
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RC_57
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In reply to Wolfpac 08 • 7:02a, 10/15/25
AG
Wolfpac 08 said:


Hillary Clinton vs Michelle Obama

Oh. So you're okay letting men fight women?
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Wolfpac 08
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In reply to RC_57 • 7:16a, 10/15/25
AG
Yes. That's already been established.

See above:
Michael Cera v Elliot Page
Michael Jackson v Makuly Culkin
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RC_57
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In reply to Wolfpac 08 • 10:26a, 10/15/25
Hwy30East
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In reply to Wolfpac 08 • 2:16p, 10/16/25
Wolfpac 08 said:
Hillary.

Hillary Clinton vs Michelle Obama


Hillary

Jack Nicholson vs Marlon Brando

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CC09LawAg
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In reply to THE_CHOSEN_ONE • 2:53p, 10/16/25
THE_CHOSEN_ONE said:
I'd give Damon the slight edge due to age

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