Wow. That looks amazing. I hope he finds someone to distribute it. I would see it in a heartbeat. Is this intended to be a movie or a TV series? I ask because the name of the video is From 500: Series Trailer

I was class of '08 as well.

Good luck, Sean and Gig 'em.

Honest feedback. The trailer is great, he seems to be very talented. But I don't like the last minute. It's a little too needy. Not to be harsh, but to me it kind of plays like:

• I'm morbidly obese because I binge eat
• ok I lost a ton of weight and now I'm skinny
• hey look at all this cool stuff I get to do now, and travel, and check out the hot chick
• hey I'm broke now and totally tapped out, everyone help get my movie distributed

Not at all saying that is the intent but that's how it comes off, at least to me. I would just cut that last minute down to about 15 seconds of wanting to help people who are struggling with obesity and please like/share and leave it at that. Two cents.

Stepped in to that expecting not to like it, but I'm impressed. Nice work.

This is a remarkable accomplishment and an incredible story. Props to your friend for having the fortitude to not only lose the weight but chronicle it in this manner. All the ingredients seem to be there for a potentially great film.

That said, while I don't agree that the last minute is needy at all - in fact, I think it's necessary for something like this - the "reveal" in the trailer feels like a missed opportunity, as it didn't feel like a reveal at all. In fact, because your friend looks so different without the weight, it took me a second to even realize that was him. Personally, I would engineer everything in the trailer around the big weight loss reveal, and then underline that reveal as best I could. The build up is great, but then all the sudden, with zero fanfare and very little indication (other than the brief record scratch), it transitions to a somewhat confusing montage of your friend pre-weight-loss with shots of someone who might be your friend post-weight-loss, and I was honestly kind of lost for about 20 seconds or so.

Otherwise, again, this is a fantastic story with seemingly a plethora of great footage, but for such an awesome feat, the sell/hook of the trailer feels like a bit of a missed opportunity.

That's a completely fair take and without taking away anything from the series I'll say that the series is about his journey "from 500" as he tackles becoming/finding his true self. The guy i knew in college is a much different person now. The weight loss is what allowed him to feel comfortable enough to become who he truly was inside....all that to say the physical weight loss was necessary on many levels but is not the main concentration of the series

Gotcha. That makes sense.

Watching it a second time, I caught him saying early in the trailer that he doesn't want to die at 33, and then there's of course the first shot of him of post-weight-loss holding up the "33" birthday candles. So that's a nice connection, but I'd still hit the audience over the head with the "33" thing early on so it's crystal clear, and then take a beat to really make it more of moment when he's holding the candles. Even if the film itself is more focused on him finding his true self, the before/after in that regard could use some clarity/distinguishing as well, and that candle moment is a nice pivot point that could really be used to sell it.

(And this is dumb, but the guy being interviewed just after the one-minute mark who says he didn't think your friend would stick with the three-week plan also kind of looks like your friend post-weight-loss, and for a second I thought it was him holding the "33" candles, but that's just me being a moron.)

Anyway, I hate to even critique something like this, as, again, it's such a great story, but since you asked, I just wanted to offer whatever constructive feedback I could.

Thanks! He appreciates all the feedback I promise

Nicely done!
I agree that there's too much "reveal" throughout the last half of the trailer. In my very amateur opinion...end the trailer teasing the weight loss results with the sunset silhouette of him and the dog walking away from the camera.

Definitely agree with the last minute. Although not the intent, it can be perceived as too desperate.

Looking forward to seeing this!

TCTTS said:

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Gotcha. That makes sense.

Watching it a second time, I caught him saying early in the trailer that he doesn't want to die at 33, and then there's of course the first shot of him of post-weight-loss holding up the "33" birthday candles. So that's a nice connection, but I'd still hit the audience over the head with the "33" thing early on so it's crystal clear, and then take a beat to really make it more of moment when he's holding the candles. Even if the film itself is more focused on him finding his true self, the before/after in that regard could use some clarity/distinguishing as well, and that candle moment is a nice pivot point that could really be used to sell it.

(And this is dumb, but the guy being interviewed just after the one-minute mark who says he didn't think your friend would stick with the three-week plan also kind of looks like your friend post-weight-loss, and for a second I thought it was him holding the "33" candles, but that's just me being a moron.)

Anyway, I hate to even critique something like this, as, again, it's such a great story, but since you asked, I just wanted to offer whatever constructive feedback I could.

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I actually did this too and had to watch the trailer a few more times. I was like "man, they sure are focusing a lot on this hater who thought he couldnt do it". It took me to the very end of the trailer the first playthrough to realize that it was him from the 33 candles onward.

I had a lot of the same reactions as you did.

Good to hear I'm not the only one.

I think the first 1:25 works for the most part. I'm a little confused as to the "Hollywood" of it all. Did he want to be an actor? Writer? Director? Either way, I think his "dream" could use a bit more specificity as it relates to Hollywood. But if that's too much to mess with, if it were me, the simplest "fix" would be to just do a hard cut to black after he says, "I think it's going to work," cut the music, and then REALLY sell/underline the "33" candles moment. Maybe even just after the cut to black, for context, have an "[X] MONTHS LATER" title over black, or something along those lines, then slowly fade up on the image of him with the candles and let that moment really breathe, use a bit more dialogue from that moment, etc. Then, after that, bring the music back in for the final montage of the trailer. And in that final montage/push I wouldn't use any pre-weight-loss footage of him. I would really sell the change/new him.

Good news is, none of these minor issues have anything to do with the story or footage itself. What matters most is all there. I just think the trailer, specifically, could use one more pass with a focus on context/underlining, and that's really it.

What an incredible story. Good for him.

very well done and a very cool story. I will definitely share it as he asked.

I concur with the others regarding the reveal. I really wasn't sure which guy was him until the very end when he starts talking. I think it should be abundantly clear at some point that ***THIS IS WHAT I LOOK LIKE NOW***

hopefully that makes sense.

again, very well done. I have a few friends from college who could use a little of this in their life.

Good feedback. I hope he's able to get it out there!

Damn man, this looks great. Actually choked up a bit TBH. Love seeing ordinary people triumph in the face of extreme adversity and overcome the odds like this. I hope this film is successful and that it opens all kinds of doors for him.

And while I thought the trailer was fantastic (I have zero film background), I think there is great input on this thread from TCTTS and a few others that might help the trailer pack even more of a punch.