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Was at the beach with Pat Benetar…

2,725 Views | 30 Replies | Last: 6 days ago by IIIHorn
Southlake
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8:30a, 2/12/26
AG
And she said, " Hit me with you pet shark…"

Was having a vegetarian dinner with John Lennon and he said, " Give peas a chance…"

Any of you clever Texags folks got one?

Happy Thursday.
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bonfarr
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8:51a, 2/12/26
AG
Jose, a Mexican immigrant, attended a MLB game for the first time in his life. Afterwards he was gushing with excitement to his buddies about the event. Miguel asks him what the best part was and he says the Americans were so polite making sure he had good seats. Miguel asks how and he says, " before first pitch everyone in the stadium stood up and asked "Jose can you see?"
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Southlake
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9:45a, 2/12/26
AG
I asked Suzanna Hoffs how to get to Cairo and she told me to walk like an Egyptian…
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Peter Piper
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9:52a, 2/12/26
Homeless guy holding his own dick in his hand walked up to Michael Jackson and Michael told him to just beat it.
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bonfarr
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10:04a, 2/12/26
AG
Dirty deeds and they're done with sheep
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StinkyPinky
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In reply to bonfarr • 10:09a, 2/12/26
AG
bonfarr said:
Dirty deeds and they're done with sheep
EOT
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Whos Juan
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10:15a, 2/12/26
AG
I can only count to four
I can only count to four
I can only count to FFFFFFFFOOOOUUUURRRR.....
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PlanoAggie
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10:39a, 2/12/26
AG
I was at a Mexican restaurant the other day and overheard Blake tell Gwen, "You're lips taste like Some.green.stuff.."
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Philo B 93
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10:50a, 2/12/26
There was a full moon on the horizon and potentially trouble on the way when I told John Fogerty of Creecence Clearwater Revival that I needed to drain my lizard. He pointed and said there's a bathroom on the right.
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bonfarr
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11:22a, 2/12/26
AG

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Hey Nav
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In reply to Southlake • 6:23p, 2/12/26
AG
I tried to do the "walk like an Egyptian" thing, and now I have to see a Cairo-practor.
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jkag89
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7:17p, 2/12/26
I'm addicted to buying old Beatles albums.
Does anyone know where I can get Help?
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RikkiTikkaTagem
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8:13p, 2/12/26
AG
I asked Jon Fogerty for directions to the men's room and he said "There's a bathroom on the right."
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jokershady
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9:40p, 2/12/26
AG
Doesn't exactly fit this thread but made me laugh way harder than it should….

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AgTrip
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9:48p, 2/12/26
In margaritaville, I stepped on a pop tart...had to limp my way home
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Mega Lops
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8:47a, 2/13/26
AG
Was talking to Jimi Hendrix one time after a show and he said, "One moment, my good sir. You see this foppish gentleman approaching whom I do not know? I need to pause and place my lips upon his lips. Your understanding of this cessation of our conversation is most appreciated. This lavender fog is quite intoxicating."
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Gigem314
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8:53a, 2/13/26
AG
Hold me closer, Tony Danza...
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MSFC Aggie
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9:48a, 2/13/26
AG
I have the sads.......Mr Jagger told me he'd never be my pizza burning
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StinkyPinky
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10:05a, 2/13/26
AG
Went to get a vasectomy consult and turns out Angus Young was my doctor. . Before we got started I told him "I got big balls".
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SgtBarbarossa
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11:11a, 2/13/26
AG
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Pichael Thompson
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12:38p, 2/13/26
*give Pete a chance


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Hey Nav
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In reply to Pichael Thompson • 12:50p, 2/13/26
AG
Loved that show.
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GrapevineAg
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10:42p, 2/14/26
AG
Alans Morissette is upset that I tried to deny her the cross-eyed bear that I gave to her.
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Equinox
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2:57p, 2/15/26
I was hanging out with my buddy who is an ornithologist. He told me he had been studying the migration habits of the California Seagull.

I replied "I wish they all could be California Gulls......."
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TellMeMore
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6:19p, 2/15/26
I needed to use the john REALLY bad. I was walking down the hall, and who did I see by John Fogarty! He could see the question in my eyes before I asked it, he smiled, pointed and said "There's a bathroom on the right"
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Philo B 93
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2:19p, 2/16/26
How do we have 3 "Bathroom on the rights" and zero "Jessie's Squirrels".

You all have problems that are hard to define. Jessies got himself a rodent and I want to make it mine.
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GrapevineAg
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3:11p, 2/16/26
AG
Was trying to talk to Jimi Hendrix at a party when he said "'scuse me while I kiss this guy."
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G Martin 87
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7:21p, 2/16/26
AG
No mention of wrapped ******s yet? Wow.
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aggiez03
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7:54p, 2/16/26
AG
Shave my wife, I'm going down for the last time....


Heard that from Dean and Rog' on the radio in Houston about 2 years ago...
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aggiez03
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7:58p, 2/16/26
AG
Little Early Burly, Gave my Anus Curly Whirly, and Ask me if I needed a RIDE...

But I was Blinded By the Light
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IIIHorn
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8:31p, 2/18/26
One, two, three.

Another one rides the bus.


( ...voice punctuated with a clap of distant thunder... )
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