Church dress codes

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Lathspell
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6:22p, 12/27/24
AG
As a 37 yo millennial who grew up going to non denominational churches, I would feel very awkward in shorts at church. I will always wear jeans and usually a button down shirt, though I probably wouldn't tuck it.

For all of us, we are supposed to make a conscious effort to not cause our brother or sisters in Christ to stumble. For this reason, I believe men and women should wear attire that covers their body. As a woman, you should not be going to church showing off your legs or cleavage. That is not the place for that kind of attire and will only draw eyes on you for the wrong reasons.

This is 2024. There is AC at church. You will not die of heatstroke if you're not wearing shorts.
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Hey...so.. um
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In reply to Zobel • 9:16p, 12/27/24
Zobel said:
yeah, because if there's one thing that was constant in Jesus' preaching it was that however you are is fine, no change necessary


How is that what you got from my post? I'm just in favor of letting people dress how they want as they come to know Jesus. Alot of people already feel uncomfortable walking into a church. I don't like to add something else for them to feel uncomfortable about.
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Zobel
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In reply to Hey...so.. um • 9:21p, 12/27/24
AG
Because "be comfortable" isn't the message Jesus went with.
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10andBOUNCE
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In reply to Zobel • 9:41p, 12/27/24
AG
Zobel said:
Because "be comfortable" isn't the message Jesus went with.

Took the words right outta my mouth. Getting to know Christ and following Him is anything but comfortable
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Pro Sandy
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In reply to Lathspell • 10:33p, 12/27/24
AG
Non denominational churches I've been in, I am out of place not being in shorts. But don't worry, no one wants to see my skinny white legs.

Wore a jacket for Christmas Eve service. Made the boys wear collared shirts. I think God is honored in our worship regardless if my boys have a collar or not, but make them dress up for Easter and Christmas.
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Hey...so.. um
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In reply to Zobel • 11:52a, 12/28/24
Zobel said:
Because "be comfortable" isn't the message Jesus went with.



But you are not Jesus. Jesus performed miracles that got people to believe in Him. It isn't about being comfortable but you know that. It is about being inviting. Those are 2 different things.

Church A says come as you are, we don't care how you dress.

Church B says you can only come to church if you wear a full suit or dress.

Church B turns people away from God because of how they dress. Church A let's them in and has a chance to save their life.

Church should be more like a hospital than country club. Church should be a place to save entire households, not flaunt how mich you love God by what you wear.
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10andBOUNCE
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In reply to Hey...so.. um • 11:59a, 12/28/24
AG
Church A should not just adopt this attitude in perpetuity as people are redeemed and pursue a life of holiness.

Church B should not be legalistic and should also welcome anyone as they are to hear the gospel.

Nice clothes =/= holiness but can be a reflection of our heart and affections towards the holy God of the universe.

Both churches need to strive to grow their church deeply from within while also speaking the truth to outsiders in a loving and gentle way. Growing in grace together.
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dermdoc
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12:08p, 12/28/24
AG
When was Jesus ever exclusive? Except with religious leaders?
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
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Zobel
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In reply to Hey...so.. um • 12:12p, 12/28/24
AG
this is a false dichotomy. "dress appropriately" does not mean country club, and it also doesn't mean uninviting.

would you show up to a wedding in shorts? no - it would be rude. and we are invited to to wedding supper of the lamb.

would you show up to court wearing an old t-shirt? no - it would be disrespectful. and we are appearing before the judge of men.

would you show up to the white house wearing pajamas? no - it would look bad. and we are coming in the presence of the king of all.

nobody said turn anyone away. the argument is not putting a means test on showing up or invitation. it is not about the new person coming, it is about the acceptable level of reverence and honor we show our Lord. you're focusing on the person on the outside - we should be focusing on the object of our worship, which is the Messiah.
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10andBOUNCE
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In reply to Zobel • 12:13p, 12/28/24
AG
Well said
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Zobel
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12:15p, 12/28/24
AG
i really don't get this at all. shorts, t shirt, flip flops, pajamas, scandalously short skirts, low cut blouses, all of these aren't appropriate attire for worship. everybody understands this. everyone has a pair of jeans and a decent looking shirt.

nobody is asking you to wear a tux.

objecting to this is laziness or rebellion for the sake of rebellion.

if putting on a pair of pants is going to be what bars you from the kingdom, that is a you problem, not a church problem.
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Frok
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1:41p, 12/28/24
AG
It's not so much the specific items being worn, it's casual service versus formal service. I don't think someone would not go to church because they can't wear shorts, they probably just feel more comfortable around people in shorts vs people dressed formally.

Wherever you fall on the spectrum I think we all agree that any church should feel inviting no matter how you are dressed.

My church generally is a jeans and khaki wearing congregation although we had many more neck ties for the Christmas service. It's a culture thing.

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10andBOUNCE
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2:22p, 12/28/24
AG
Kind of begs the question, why so many are casual for 50 Sundays of the year but will "dress up" for their respective Christmas Eve and Easter services.
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Pro Sandy
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In reply to Zobel • 4:04p, 12/28/24
AG
Zobel said:
this is a false dichotomy. "dress appropriately" does not mean country club, and it also doesn't mean uninviting.

would you show up to a wedding in shorts? no - it would be rude. and we are invited to to wedding supper of the lamb.

would you show up to court wearing an old t-shirt? no - it would be disrespectful. and we are appearing before the judge of men.

would you show up to the white house wearing pajamas? no - it would look bad. and we are coming in the presence of the king of all.

nobody said turn anyone away. the argument is not putting a means test on showing up or invitation. it is not about the new person coming, it is about the acceptable level of reverence and honor we show our Lord. you're focusing on the person on the outside - we should be focusing on the object of our worship, which is the Messiah.
There have been people saying to turn them away. That is the last paragraph of the original post on this thread and those that used the parable of the wedding feast as justification.

If we are dressing for modesty, agreed on the clothes you listed. But if I am going to the places you listed, a tux might be appropriate. Jeans and a button up not appropriate for a wedding feast
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The Banned
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In reply to Pro Sandy • 4:08p, 12/28/24
Pro Sandy said:
Zobel said:
this is a false dichotomy. "dress appropriately" does not mean country club, and it also doesn't mean uninviting.

would you show up to a wedding in shorts? no - it would be rude. and we are invited to to wedding supper of the lamb.

would you show up to court wearing an old t-shirt? no - it would be disrespectful. and we are appearing before the judge of men.

would you show up to the white house wearing pajamas? no - it would look bad. and we are coming in the presence of the king of all.

nobody said turn anyone away. the argument is not putting a means test on showing up or invitation. it is not about the new person coming, it is about the acceptable level of reverence and honor we show our Lord. you're focusing on the person on the outside - we should be focusing on the object of our worship, which is the Messiah.
There have been people saying to turn them away. That is the last paragraph of the original post on this thread and those that used the parable of the wedding feast as justification.

If we are dressing for modesty, agreed on the clothes you listed. But if I am going to the places you listed, a tux might be appropriate. Jeans and a button up not appropriate for a wedding feast


The OP does not call for turning people away. It calls for telling congregants to dress better
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Zobel
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In reply to Pro Sandy • 4:09p, 12/28/24
AG
Ok so you agree that there are inappropriate ways to be started. So what is and is not appropriate for a church service?
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Pro Sandy
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In reply to Zobel • 4:35p, 12/28/24
AG
Zobel said:
Ok so you agree that there are inappropriate ways to be started. So what is and is not appropriate for a church service?
It's throughout the entire thread.

Here's one on page one. https://texags.com/forums/15/topics/3503376/replies/68897395#68897395

And no hat, because mama says so.
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Pro Sandy
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In reply to The Banned • 4:37p, 12/28/24
AG
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
Zobel said:
this is a false dichotomy. "dress appropriately" does not mean country club, and it also doesn't mean uninviting.

would you show up to a wedding in shorts? no - it would be rude. and we are invited to to wedding supper of the lamb.

would you show up to court wearing an old t-shirt? no - it would be disrespectful. and we are appearing before the judge of men.

would you show up to the white house wearing pajamas? no - it would look bad. and we are coming in the presence of the king of all.

nobody said turn anyone away. the argument is not putting a means test on showing up or invitation. it is not about the new person coming, it is about the acceptable level of reverence and honor we show our Lord. you're focusing on the person on the outside - we should be focusing on the object of our worship, which is the Messiah.
There have been people saying to turn them away. That is the last paragraph of the original post on this thread and those that used the parable of the wedding feast as justification.

If we are dressing for modesty, agreed on the clothes you listed. But if I am going to the places you listed, a tux might be appropriate. Jeans and a button up not appropriate for a wedding feast


The OP does not call for turning people away. It calls for telling congregants to dress better
And also elders seem less likely to call them out on it. If I showed up in short and flip flops on Sunday, I'm pretty sure some old lady I didn't know would have given me a reason to go home and change.

That's turning people away.
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The Banned
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In reply to Pro Sandy • 4:52p, 12/28/24
Pro Sandy said:
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
Zobel said:
this is a false dichotomy. "dress appropriately" does not mean country club, and it also doesn't mean uninviting.

would you show up to a wedding in shorts? no - it would be rude. and we are invited to to wedding supper of the lamb.

would you show up to court wearing an old t-shirt? no - it would be disrespectful. and we are appearing before the judge of men.

would you show up to the white house wearing pajamas? no - it would look bad. and we are coming in the presence of the king of all.

nobody said turn anyone away. the argument is not putting a means test on showing up or invitation. it is not about the new person coming, it is about the acceptable level of reverence and honor we show our Lord. you're focusing on the person on the outside - we should be focusing on the object of our worship, which is the Messiah.
There have been people saying to turn them away. That is the last paragraph of the original post on this thread and those that used the parable of the wedding feast as justification.

If we are dressing for modesty, agreed on the clothes you listed. But if I am going to the places you listed, a tux might be appropriate. Jeans and a button up not appropriate for a wedding feast


The OP does not call for turning people away. It calls for telling congregants to dress better
And also elders seem less likely to call them out on it. If I showed up in short and flip flops on Sunday, I'm pretty sure some old lady I didn't know would have given me a reason to go home and change.

That's turning people away.


Telling people to change is not turning them away. Choosing not to change because how you want to dress is more important than going to church is turning yourself away.

But all of this ignores the obvious colloquial language. OP can correct me if I'm wrong, but I sincerely doubt that he means he would be literally turned away from attending.

ETA: I'm pretty sure "some old lady" isn't the leader of the church either.
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Pro Sandy
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In reply to The Banned • 4:57p, 12/28/24
AG
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
Zobel said:
this is a false dichotomy. "dress appropriately" does not mean country club, and it also doesn't mean uninviting.

would you show up to a wedding in shorts? no - it would be rude. and we are invited to to wedding supper of the lamb.

would you show up to court wearing an old t-shirt? no - it would be disrespectful. and we are appearing before the judge of men.

would you show up to the white house wearing pajamas? no - it would look bad. and we are coming in the presence of the king of all.

nobody said turn anyone away. the argument is not putting a means test on showing up or invitation. it is not about the new person coming, it is about the acceptable level of reverence and honor we show our Lord. you're focusing on the person on the outside - we should be focusing on the object of our worship, which is the Messiah.
There have been people saying to turn them away. That is the last paragraph of the original post on this thread and those that used the parable of the wedding feast as justification.

If we are dressing for modesty, agreed on the clothes you listed. But if I am going to the places you listed, a tux might be appropriate. Jeans and a button up not appropriate for a wedding feast


The OP does not call for turning people away. It calls for telling congregants to dress better
And also elders seem less likely to call them out on it. If I showed up in short and flip flops on Sunday, I'm pretty sure some old lady I didn't know would have given me a reason to go home and change.

That's turning people away.


Telling people to change is not turning them away. Choosing not to change because how you want to dress is more important than going to church is turning yourself away.

But all of this ignores the obvious colloquial language. OP can correct me if I'm wrong, but I sincerely doubt that he means he would be literally turned away from attending.

ETA: I'm pretty sure "some old lady" isn't the leader of the church either.
He wants the elders to call them out. I quoted it and they are the leader of the church.

If I go to a church and don't meet the prescribed dress code and an old lady gives me a reason to leave and the elder shames me, I have been turned away. Turned away because of my clothes. Which may even be modest, but doesn't match what the OP defines as appropriate.

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The Banned
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In reply to Pro Sandy • 5:14p, 12/28/24
Pro Sandy said:
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
Zobel said:
this is a false dichotomy. "dress appropriately" does not mean country club, and it also doesn't mean uninviting.

would you show up to a wedding in shorts? no - it would be rude. and we are invited to to wedding supper of the lamb.

would you show up to court wearing an old t-shirt? no - it would be disrespectful. and we are appearing before the judge of men.

would you show up to the white house wearing pajamas? no - it would look bad. and we are coming in the presence of the king of all.

nobody said turn anyone away. the argument is not putting a means test on showing up or invitation. it is not about the new person coming, it is about the acceptable level of reverence and honor we show our Lord. you're focusing on the person on the outside - we should be focusing on the object of our worship, which is the Messiah.
There have been people saying to turn them away. That is the last paragraph of the original post on this thread and those that used the parable of the wedding feast as justification.

If we are dressing for modesty, agreed on the clothes you listed. But if I am going to the places you listed, a tux might be appropriate. Jeans and a button up not appropriate for a wedding feast


The OP does not call for turning people away. It calls for telling congregants to dress better
And also elders seem less likely to call them out on it. If I showed up in short and flip flops on Sunday, I'm pretty sure some old lady I didn't know would have given me a reason to go home and change.

That's turning people away.


Telling people to change is not turning them away. Choosing not to change because how you want to dress is more important than going to church is turning yourself away.

But all of this ignores the obvious colloquial language. OP can correct me if I'm wrong, but I sincerely doubt that he means he would be literally turned away from attending.

ETA: I'm pretty sure "some old lady" isn't the leader of the church either.
He wants the elders to call them out. I quoted it and they are the leader of the church.

If I go to a church and don't meet the prescribed dress code and an old lady gives me a reason to leave and the elder shames me, I have been turned away. Turned away because of my clothes. Which may even be modest, but doesn't match what the OP defines as appropriate.



Maybe it's just me, but I have never attended a church of any denomination where the pastor wasn't calling out tenured believers. That is, by definition, a pastor's job. Shepherds tell the sheep what to do. The sheep are those of their flock. Random sheep showing up are treated with care and concern, and not held to the same standard.

Now if you have examples of first timers showing up and being told they're not allowed because of their attire, I am willing to listen to your experience. I haven't seen it and I do not believe that is what the OP was shooting for.
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Pro Sandy
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In reply to The Banned • 5:20p, 12/28/24
AG
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
Zobel said:
this is a false dichotomy. "dress appropriately" does not mean country club, and it also doesn't mean uninviting.

would you show up to a wedding in shorts? no - it would be rude. and we are invited to to wedding supper of the lamb.

would you show up to court wearing an old t-shirt? no - it would be disrespectful. and we are appearing before the judge of men.

would you show up to the white house wearing pajamas? no - it would look bad. and we are coming in the presence of the king of all.

nobody said turn anyone away. the argument is not putting a means test on showing up or invitation. it is not about the new person coming, it is about the acceptable level of reverence and honor we show our Lord. you're focusing on the person on the outside - we should be focusing on the object of our worship, which is the Messiah.
There have been people saying to turn them away. That is the last paragraph of the original post on this thread and those that used the parable of the wedding feast as justification.

If we are dressing for modesty, agreed on the clothes you listed. But if I am going to the places you listed, a tux might be appropriate. Jeans and a button up not appropriate for a wedding feast


The OP does not call for turning people away. It calls for telling congregants to dress better
And also elders seem less likely to call them out on it. If I showed up in short and flip flops on Sunday, I'm pretty sure some old lady I didn't know would have given me a reason to go home and change.

That's turning people away.


Telling people to change is not turning them away. Choosing not to change because how you want to dress is more important than going to church is turning yourself away.

But all of this ignores the obvious colloquial language. OP can correct me if I'm wrong, but I sincerely doubt that he means he would be literally turned away from attending.

ETA: I'm pretty sure "some old lady" isn't the leader of the church either.
He wants the elders to call them out. I quoted it and they are the leader of the church.

If I go to a church and don't meet the prescribed dress code and an old lady gives me a reason to leave and the elder shames me, I have been turned away. Turned away because of my clothes. Which may even be modest, but doesn't match what the OP defines as appropriate.



Maybe it's just me, but I have never attended a church of any denomination where the pastor wasn't calling out tenured believers. That is, by definition, a pastor's job. Shepherds tell the sheep what to do. The sheep are those of their flock. Random sheep showing up are treated with care and concern, and not held to the same standard.

Now if you have examples of first timers showing up and being told they're not allowed because of their attire, I am willing to listen to your experience. I haven't seen it and I do not believe that is what the OP was shooting for.
Been in lots of churches and never when the pastor called out someone because they had a tshirt or shorts or didn't wear a tie.

I have seen the pastor call out the congregation for gathering on Sunday, looking all nice and put together, just to go out in the world and be just as sinful as the unbelievers.

Maybe your church is different.
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The Banned
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In reply to Pro Sandy • 5:32p, 12/28/24
Pro Sandy said:
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
The Banned said:
Pro Sandy said:
Zobel said:
this is a false dichotomy. "dress appropriately" does not mean country club, and it also doesn't mean uninviting.

would you show up to a wedding in shorts? no - it would be rude. and we are invited to to wedding supper of the lamb.

would you show up to court wearing an old t-shirt? no - it would be disrespectful. and we are appearing before the judge of men.

would you show up to the white house wearing pajamas? no - it would look bad. and we are coming in the presence of the king of all.

nobody said turn anyone away. the argument is not putting a means test on showing up or invitation. it is not about the new person coming, it is about the acceptable level of reverence and honor we show our Lord. you're focusing on the person on the outside - we should be focusing on the object of our worship, which is the Messiah.
There have been people saying to turn them away. That is the last paragraph of the original post on this thread and those that used the parable of the wedding feast as justification.

If we are dressing for modesty, agreed on the clothes you listed. But if I am going to the places you listed, a tux might be appropriate. Jeans and a button up not appropriate for a wedding feast


The OP does not call for turning people away. It calls for telling congregants to dress better
And also elders seem less likely to call them out on it. If I showed up in short and flip flops on Sunday, I'm pretty sure some old lady I didn't know would have given me a reason to go home and change.

That's turning people away.


Telling people to change is not turning them away. Choosing not to change because how you want to dress is more important than going to church is turning yourself away.

But all of this ignores the obvious colloquial language. OP can correct me if I'm wrong, but I sincerely doubt that he means he would be literally turned away from attending.

ETA: I'm pretty sure "some old lady" isn't the leader of the church either.
He wants the elders to call them out. I quoted it and they are the leader of the church.

If I go to a church and don't meet the prescribed dress code and an old lady gives me a reason to leave and the elder shames me, I have been turned away. Turned away because of my clothes. Which may even be modest, but doesn't match what the OP defines as appropriate.



Maybe it's just me, but I have never attended a church of any denomination where the pastor wasn't calling out tenured believers. That is, by definition, a pastor's job. Shepherds tell the sheep what to do. The sheep are those of their flock. Random sheep showing up are treated with care and concern, and not held to the same standard.

Now if you have examples of first timers showing up and being told they're not allowed because of their attire, I am willing to listen to your experience. I haven't seen it and I do not believe that is what the OP was shooting for.
Been in lots of churches and never when the pastor called out someone because they had a tshirt or shorts or didn't wear a tie.

I have seen the pastor call out the congregation for gathering on Sunday, looking all nice and put together, just to go out in the world and be just as sinful as the unbelievers.

Maybe your church is different.


Why the false dichotomy? Why can't a pastor call out lackadaisical approach to church AND bad behavior the other 6 days of the week?
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Howdy, it is me!
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In reply to 10andBOUNCE • 5:42p, 12/28/24
AG
10andBOUNCE said:
Kind of begs the question, why so many are casual for 50 Sundays of the year but will "dress up" for their respective Christmas Eve and Easter services.


This really is an excellent point!
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Hey...so.. um
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In reply to 10andBOUNCE • 6:24p, 12/28/24
10andBOUNCE said:


Nice clothes =/= holiness but can be a reflection of our heart and affections towards the holy God of the universe.

Both churches need to strive to grow their church deeply from within while also speaking the truth to outsiders in a loving and gentle way. Growing in grace together.


Clothes are pretty far down the list of a reflection of your heart. Putting a shopping cart back is way higher on that list and probably a hundred other things.

I agree with the second piece. Idk about everyone's church, but we do have rules and guidelines for people who serve at the church and they are held to a higher standard. The higher you go in the volunteer leadership structure, the higher those standards are. But I don't think that is what the OP was about. It was about attire of the entire congregation which would include first time guests.
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