I have two offers, what would you do?

14,196 Views | 91 Replies | Last: 3 yr ago by BlueTaze
BenTheGoodAg
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In reply to htxag09 • 11:25a, 8/5/22
AG
htxag09 said:
Not sure how to word this, but the acceptance of the wife's position to not want to move are interesting to me. Relationships involve some give and take and, sure, there could be legit reasons why she doesn't want to move. Could also just be that she's comfortable and doesn't want anything to change.

In one of my classes at A&M our professor was telling us about some industry panels and the biggest knock against A&M grads (and Texans in general) is the unwillingness to move.

This isn't anything against the OP or his wife, specifically. I don't know their situation and, as I said above, there may be legit reasons. But, in most cases, moving shouldn't be as non negotiable as a lot of people make it....
Hope this doesn't derail the OP, but I guess this doesn't resonate with me at all. I think I tend to be pretty loyal to my employer and enjoy my career, but my life is outside of work. I've got family, church, a great community. You can find elements of that everywhere, but not all of it.

I worked for a company here for many years in a local office that had over 70 years of history in a local community, but was acquired 20 years ago by a larger corporate entity. We had a very talented group of professionals that had a great reputation in the industry for executing projects, and were consistently billable. The work could be performed practically anywhere.

One random day, corporate rolled in and shut the office down, in the middle of some huge projects. They did give a lot of people opportunities elsewhere, but really damaged their reputation and negatively affecting these ongoing projects. It's a small community, so I think they hoped people would be forced to move, but were surprised to find many local employers happy to stretch themselves to pick up the talent. I was given an opportunity by corporate in a large city, but I was pretty clear that if I was being forced to move, I'd find another company to move for. Screw 'em. They eventually moved a lot of these operations overseas, and have struggled in this sector since.
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htxag09
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In reply to BenTheGoodAg • 12:02p, 8/5/22
AG
My point isn't sacrifice everything for work. If you knew me, you'd know I value work/life balance more than most and am not afraid to draw the lines, I've been burned too many times in the past.

My point is not to be so closed off to opportunities. Just because you live in Texas and have a good community, etc doesn't mean that you won't be happy if an opportunity arises in Tennessee. Getting outside your comfort zone and embracing change is good for a lot of people, and in more ways than just a job opportunity.
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BenTheGoodAg
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In reply to htxag09 • 12:25p, 8/5/22
AG
I can agree with your point here. And I've taken some opportunities that were 1-2 years elsewhere - to your point, great for personal growth, and walked away with some great lifelong friendships. But ultimately, after a period, I made some career sacrifices to come back home and be here.

My big rub is that I've got zero empathy for companies or industry panels that complain about people not moving. I clearly remember our company complaining about their projects being impacted because nobody wanted to move for them.
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Deputy Travis Junior
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1:31p, 8/5/22
I've thought about this some more and want to flip my recommendation from option A to B. If your wife's non-passive-aggressive response was "sure take the job, but nah I'm not moving with you," then it's probably too late to salvage your marriage. So you might as well earn some more money and buff up your resume by working a 60-70 hour/week job that'll distract you from your divorce.
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aggie_wes
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6:11p, 8/5/22
AG
WHERE DID OP GO?
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Bob Kelso
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10:07p, 8/5/22
AG
Sorry -been a bit preoccupied.

So I decided on company B, however the organization understood my perspective on career progression and jumping too high too quick. They were able to accommodate and actually adjust the role/salary accordingly, which is more than company A regardless. I'll still make the drive out to BFE on occasion and a nearby branch business to dock in to cut the overall drive time. I'm happy with the choice and I'm glad it worked out.

If anyone was wondering, assuming that didn't happen, I would have chosen B for the experience -though likely a giant ass kicking, you usually come out stronger in the end.
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DannyDuberstein
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11:25p, 8/5/22
AG
The wife doesn't care until you are missing a ton of family stuff snd the burden of dealing with the kids falls almost entirely on her. Gotta have a serious talk about what this life will look like in detail
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YouBet
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In reply to Bob Kelso • 9:12a, 8/6/22
AG
Bob Kelso said:
Sorry -been a bit preoccupied.

So I decided on company B, however the organization understood my perspective on career progression and jumping too high too quick. They were able to accommodate and actually adjust the role/salary accordingly, which is more than company A regardless. I'll still make the drive out to BFE on occasion and a nearby branch business to dock in to cut the overall drive time. I'm happy with the choice and I'm glad it worked out.

If anyone was wondering, assuming that didn't happen, I would have chosen B for the experience -though likely a giant ass kicking, you usually come out stronger in the end.
I assume then y'all agreed to downgrade it from VP? Is it still a leadership position?
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AgsMyDude
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In reply to Bob Kelso • 9:23a, 8/6/22
AG
Bob Kelso said:
Sorry -been a bit preoccupied.

So I decided on company B, however the organization understood my perspective on career progression and jumping too high too quick. They were able to accommodate and actually adjust the role/salary accordingly, which is more than company A regardless. I'll still make the drive out to BFE on occasion and a nearby branch business to dock in to cut the overall drive time. I'm happy with the choice and I'm glad it worked out.

If anyone was wondering, assuming that didn't happen, I would have chosen B for the experience -though likely a giant ass kicking, you usually come out stronger in the end.


Sounds like an awesome compromise with a chance to grow into that VP role while not having to move permanently.

Well done and congrats!
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GAC06
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12:24p, 8/6/22
AG
This advice probably isn't worth much without knowing the actual locations but why not move part way there? Having a separate place is an extra expense and hassle and stress
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Deputy Travis Junior
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In reply to Bob Kelso • 1:43p, 8/8/22
Bob Kelso said:
Sorry -been a bit preoccupied.

So I decided on company B, however the organization understood my perspective on career progression and jumping too high too quick. They were able to accommodate and actually adjust the role/salary accordingly, which is more than company A regardless. I'll still make the drive out to BFE on occasion and a nearby branch business to dock in to cut the overall drive time. I'm happy with the choice and I'm glad it worked out.

If anyone was wondering, assuming that didn't happen, I would have chosen B for the experience -though likely a giant ass kicking, you usually come out stronger in the end.


So you and your pharmacist wife would be making a cool quarter million (ish) if you took option A, but you instead chose to take a grinder job an hour and a half away that'll require you to spend a decent number of nights on the road? I know this sounds overly dramatic but this is the sort of decision that people say they regret when they're on their death beds. You're going to put immense strain on your marriage + miss watching your kids grow up in the hunt for more money despite the fact that you all are already making quite a bit.

Go find a big promotion that allows you to live at home. Yes it'll take longer but you won't miss out on your life. This is a terrible terrible decision.
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Ogre09
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2:02p, 8/8/22
AG
Different folks have different priorities I guess
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Baron von Bulsh
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In reply to Duncan Idaho • 7:27a, 8/13/22
Duncan Idaho said:
Isn't a pharmacist one of the most in demand professions?

Not really anymore. The market has become pretty saturated and jobs are becoming much harder to come by these days, especially the quality (non Walgreens and CVS) jobs.

If his wife is in a good spot now, I could definitely understand any hesitance on her part to make a move.
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Astroag
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In reply to BenTheGoodAg • 11:50a, 8/13/22
AG
BenTheGoodAg said:
I think several points good probably made, but to add:

VP can mean a lot of different things. My current VP has over 1500 engineering reports (and manufacturing has 3,000). In my old companies, there were VPs with few reports and more 'programmatic' scope. I think it really depends on what you're doing/making/workforce size is to understand if the salary is really worth it.

And VP of manufacturing is typically an 'always on' job. Downtime is lost money - It is your job to get widgets out the door. Manufacturing cultures are often very reactive and fighting fires at all hours. I'd want to know what I was stepping into from that standpoint. However, some people thrive in that environment, and it could be an epic opportunity.

Not to dog on Lean Six Sigma, but in my experience, there's a ceiling for these professionals if they don't go do something else. Whether perceived or real, in our company they are earmarked as those who couldn't cut it in the "real" areas of the company, eg manufacturing, engineering, etc. If they really want to move up, typically, they've got to prove themselves elsewhere. At a minimum, I only offer this so you'll evaluate what the culture is like in relation to LSS, and what your longer term goals are.

Personally, I wouldn't give up the family life for the extra income. And pound for pound, you're spending more in time and expenses to take option B. It's not $130k vs $225k. It's $130k vs $225k + travel time + gas and vehicle costs + extra living expenses + extra work hours + higher taxes. That equation will still heavily favor option B monetarily, but it won't be double, and it would be good to really evaluate the costs to do a better comparison.


You left off the bonus and equity that would be significantly more for the vp role all things being equal.
_______________________________________________________


If ya ain't cheatin, you ain't tryin!!!
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Diggity
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In reply to Baron von Bulsh • 12:31p, 8/13/22
AG
Must be regional?

Quote:
Walgreens Boots Alliance Inc. is offering signing bonuses up to $75,000 to pharmacists in some markets as the company struggles to fill jobs amid a chronic worker shortage that became acute during the Covid-19 pandemic.


https://www.wsj.com/articles/walgreens-pays-bonuses-up-to-75-000-to-recruit-pharmacists-11660227605?st=l3ssvvjltf0on86&reflink=desktopwebshare_permalink

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Petrino1
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In reply to Diggity • 8:38a, 8/14/22
Diggity said:
Must be regional?

Quote:
Walgreens Boots Alliance Inc. is offering signing bonuses up to $75,000 to pharmacists in some markets as the company struggles to fill jobs amid a chronic worker shortage that became acute during the Covid-19 pandemic.


https://www.wsj.com/articles/walgreens-pays-bonuses-up-to-75-000-to-recruit-pharmacists-11660227605?st=l3ssvvjltf0on86&reflink=desktopwebshare_permalink



The company I work for hires Pharmacists across the US. I can confirm they are in high demand and well paid.
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ag94whoop
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9:50a, 8/16/22
AG
Speaking from experience….

Back around 2005 I was married with two young kids (we eventually had a third)…son was 5 and daughter 2. I was very focused on making more money and having a "successful career". I went from a $85k job that I worked from home 75% and traveled 25%, had lots of time with family and kids, to a $150k job where I worked in an office with crazy politics, I was gone all the time, under major stress and traveled a bit more. I then tried to further my career again and started my own business a few years later, taking even more time, adding even more stress and never really being around.

**** fell apart and I lost virtually everything except my family. Restarted. I refocused and care much more about family time and it has overall improved life tremendously.

However, that period from 2005-2012 my oldest went from 5-12 years old and I essentially "lost" those 7 years I can never regain. To this day, no matter how much I tried to be involved coaching, being there, doing things with him, we simply don't have the connection we had when he was younger. He is 21 now. I love my son and I know he loves me but that lost connection is distant with us and it makes me truly regret not making my family my focus. Since 2012, I have been a very different dad and since my other kids were younger, we are pretty close. Lesson learned the hard way.

Money doesn't matter without family. Everyone has a different story. That's mine. Some guys don't care as much, or are simply able to be both a career guy and a family guy better. Figure out what matters the most to you, talk to your wife, pray about it.

Good luck and Gigem
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FrioAg 00
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10:35a, 8/16/22
AG
Happens at every level, and at every scale and every phase of a career. Choosing the most immediately lucrative option of all the options available is rarely the best choice, IMO.

When I took my current role, it was the first time in my career I can say I am in the role I want to retire from. As long as company culture stays steady, and my group of colleagues (who I really respect and like) stays pretty stable - I want to retire from the exact job I have today.

That alone has led to enormous job satisfaction, which of course is circular because it makes me happier, and that makes me a much better husband and dad.

I still get recruiters who call, or industry folks who back channel to me to see if I'm interested in roles elsewhere. It feels so good to tell them I have zero interest and truly mean it.


So count me as another vote in favor of "money isn't everything"
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Petrino1
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In reply to FrioAg 00 • 12:04p, 8/16/22
FrioAg 00 said:
Happens at every level, and at every scale and every phase of a career. Choosing the most immediately lucrative option of all the options available is rarely the best choice, IMO.

When I took my current role, it was the first time in my career I can say I am in the role I want to retire from. As long as company culture stays steady, and my group of colleagues (who I really respect and like) stays pretty stable - I want to retire from the exact job I have today.

That alone has led to enormous job satisfaction, which of course is circular because it makes me happier, and that makes me a much better husband and dad.

I still get recruiters who call, or industry folks who back channel to me to see if I'm interested in roles elsewhere. It feels so good to tell them I have zero interest and truly mean it.


So count me as another vote in favor of "money isn't everything"
The problem with this mentality is that so many things could go wrong at your current job that chances are you wont stay at that job forever: new boss/management comes in and makes your life miserable, scope of your work changes, layoffs, company financial issues etc. Its hard to go all in with an employer, its best to always have a backup plan. I had a dream job where I wanted to stay forever, then covid hit and I was laid off 2 weeks later along with half my team.
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In reply to ag94whoop • 9:18a, 8/17/22
Howdy Dammit
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9:24a, 10/17/22
AG
Would anyone change their opinion if OPs wife was a stay at home mom? In a similar position to OP except wife doesn't work. Have a good paying mid 6 figure job with relatively low stress and very flexible hours. Have the opportunity to make significantly more money but with more stress and probably 10 more hours of work per week. It wouldn't require relocating.
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BlueTaze
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10:35a, 10/17/22
If you devote some time to the VP role then look for a better role after 6mo or so, you may find a new gig with work/life balance of #1 and pay of #2. If risk averse, maybe just go with #1 and looks for new gig, only diff is you won't have the senior role on your resume.
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