I don't have much to add but I want to say I wish you all the best and will happily support you anyway I can. It sounds like you are taking a step in the right direction.
Alcoholics Anonymous
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Last: 13 days ago by Tumble Weed
A friend of mine beat his addiction through the Celebrate Recovery program. I've heard good things about it from other people, too.
RickSawyer said:
I would find a single bar tender early on and have a very frank conversation with him/her. The jist of it, "no matter what I walk up here and ask for, give me tonic and lime, I am a recovering alcoholic and not totally comfortable sharing that in this community."
You took a page right from my book...........this was my go-to strategy early on.
For happy hours with co-workers, I'd arrive 15 minutes early, locate our waiter, and tell him/her that I want a tonic with a lime. I told him/her, when it gets empty, I'll have the exact same drink. And if anybody wants to buy a round or shots, I'll stick with another tonic and lime.
Eventually I told these co-workers that I quit drinking and they were totally supportive of me. However, prior to spilling "the news" to them, I dwelled so heavily in my mind on how & when I would break it to them. Turned-out to be a non-issue after all......all of that anxiety, distress, and hesitation in my brain turned-out to be useless mental masturbation.
As someone stated earlier, your true friends will stick with you once you open-up to them. They'll be supportive. Heck, some may more than likely be totally impressed with your commitment.
Good stuff !!
I really find it disheartening that it is considered somewhat unacceptable/poor etiquette to refrain from alcohol in a social setting where others are drinking. I've known several folks that knew they had a hard time limiting themselves, but still would start drinking at social gatherings because they wanted to not feel like the odd man out without a beer in their hands.
And unfortunately I think the beer companies like to push the idea that every party has to have alcohol, and everyone needs to tank up to have a good time.
Also, I think everyone should try abstaining from various things for periods of time, just to understand what it's like to go without it, and understand how their body may or may not be addicted to it. Whether it be alcohol, cigarettes, caffeine, and even food (intermittent fasting).
And unfortunately I think the beer companies like to push the idea that every party has to have alcohol, and everyone needs to tank up to have a good time.
Also, I think everyone should try abstaining from various things for periods of time, just to understand what it's like to go without it, and understand how their body may or may not be addicted to it. Whether it be alcohol, cigarettes, caffeine, and even food (intermittent fasting).
Ok so this thread inspired me to do a 30 day "dry run".
Like Bigtruckguy and others have said, it is ridiculous how so many activities have become so linked to drinking. Really bothers me that I have this mentality. Hell, I just bought a bag of lump charcoal this morning and felt disppointed because I knew I wouldn't be drinking the next time I grill.
Like Bigtruckguy and others have said, it is ridiculous how so many activities have become so linked to drinking. Really bothers me that I have this mentality. Hell, I just bought a bag of lump charcoal this morning and felt disppointed because I knew I wouldn't be drinking the next time I grill.
This is very true. Hopefully you have good friends and they will encourage you on your journey instead of buying you a beer.Quote:
The hardest part for me is no the alcohol itself, but losing the social aspect. It's crazy how much social life revolves around drinking.
I can tell when I've had too much the night before. I get anxiety bad the next day. Reason enough to quit. Used to not do that to me.
bam02 said:
Ok so this thread inspired me to do a 30 day "dry run".
Like Bigtruckguy and others have said, it is ridiculous how so many activities have become so linked to drinking. Really bothers me that I have this mentality. Hell, I just bought a bag of lump charcoal this morning and felt disppointed because I knew I wouldn't be drinking the next time I grill.
I understand completely! I wrongly associated my enjoyment of a good time with the inclusion of alcohol... a beer around the smoker, bourbon around a fireplace, wine at dinner, beers while fishing etc... what seems so elementary now was a real revelation then - I did enjoy those times very much and alcohol did not assist in my enjoyment as much as it detracted from my ability to actually be present in those moments.
I still get on my patio, turn on some Hayes Carll and sit back around a fire. It's a great time and the ice cold Topo Chico tastes great as well!
Good luck!
Yeah! The anxiety got horrible for me too. Shaking and panicking. Worse than a hangover
What the general consensus on non alcoholic beer, other than it tastes like piss?
I don't mess with non-alcoholic beer. Still expensive and no buzz.
I drink water or Diet Dr. Pepper now.
I'm an addict in general so every day since I got sober I work out every day (sometimes twice a day)
I HAVE to be obsessed with something it seems. Might as well run
I drink water or Diet Dr. Pepper now.
I'm an addict in general so every day since I got sober I work out every day (sometimes twice a day)
I HAVE to be obsessed with something it seems. Might as well run
Pahdz said:
What the general consensus on non alcoholic beer, other than it tastes like piss?
That is an interesting and controversial subject even in the sober / alcohol free community to be honest. My opinion, from my perspective replacing beer with an alcohol free (actually usually less than or equal to 0.50% abv) option isn't the worst thing in the world but I do think those who go this path need to look at themselves with a very honest lens. For me, af beers can be detrimental to my goal and if I am being honest with myself I am just using them to replace the crux of my issue to begin with which puts me on very thin ice.
If I am looking for something effervescent and cold to drink I turn to La Croix and Topi Chico. Rarely, I will enjoy the depth of flavor in kombucha (maybe four times a year...) even though they can contain similar amounts of alcohol as af beers. I stay away from the AF beers and wines.
If your only option for a night is tanking a case or drinking a few af beers then yeah, by all means drink the af options but I think some introspection and CBT would be very helpful for this oerson to understand the triggers and drivers behind the need / desire to drink.
Your mileage may vary.
-Rick
Quote:
I HAVE to be obsessed with something it seems. Might as well run
Lots of former drug/alcohol addicts in the ultra world, as I'm sure you know.
I have a very addictive personality, but I guess I was lucky to find running at a young age instead of alcohol. As much as I love drinking, I can put it on hold or limit myself bc I I know at a certain point it interferes with my running.
400 days today!
RickSawyer said:
400 days today!
K Bo said:RickSawyer said:
400 days today!
Congratulations !!
RickSawyer said:
400 days today!
HELL YES!!!! Way to go.
35 for me! Lol. Feel great though.
Keep kickin ass RickSawyer
35 for me! Lol. Feel great though.
Keep kickin ass RickSawyer
One day or 400, y'all are absolutely boss for taking this problem by the gonads instead of tap-dancing around it. Godspeed.
Some Junkie Cosmonaut
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Quote:
As someone stated earlier, your true friends will stick with you once you open-up to them. They'll be supportive.
absolutely. and if they're great friends, and know you well like mine do, the reaction will be "about damn time, how can i help?".
i wasn't worried about losing the social aspect as i had already long ago self-segregated because i was way off the deep end and hid from people. the reaction to my sobriety in my life has been more "we're happy to have you back" and zero lamenting the loss of a drinking buddy because with my addiction i was way less drinking buddy and way more pain in the ass you had to worry about. that wasn't fun for anyone.
Some Junkie Cosmonaut
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and as mentioned above, 24 hours at a time is key. today i'm exactly two weeks shy of one year and the first thought in my head is still "you know what would be a great way to celebrate..."
that monster is in me and is always lurking but one day at a time keeps him at bay.
that monster is in me and is always lurking but one day at a time keeps him at bay.
ruddyduck said:
and as mentioned above, 24 hours at a time is key. today i'm exactly two weeks shy of one year and the first thought in my head is still "you know what would be a great way to celebrate..."
that monster is in me and is always lurking but one day at a time keeps him at bay.
Congrats man!
I understand- just finished a ton of yard work and now sitting in the back of the property watching my kids play with a La Croix in my hands but I certainly do think about how nice an ice cold IPA would be... and, if I could have that single IPA and walk in the house and have no desire to drink more I likely wouldn't be posting in this thread. My reality is the single IPA turns into maybe 4-10x and I may look for more excuses to keep drinking, open some wine for the wife or schedule dinner around drinking.
Think I will smash this La Croix, grab another on the way into the house, pinch my wife's butt and play some more with my kids.
Jumping in on this thread. Today makes it six days without a drink. Longest stretch I can remember in a while.
Made it through my first big test - out at a concert last night. Tonic water and lime instead of beer. It was cheaper and I felt better this morning after a late night than I normally do.
Loading up on cream soda, root beer, and topo Chico for the weekend. I feel like i need a drink in my hand while I watch football and play with the kiddos, so hoping this will help.
Made it through my first big test - out at a concert last night. Tonic water and lime instead of beer. It was cheaper and I felt better this morning after a late night than I normally do.
Loading up on cream soda, root beer, and topo Chico for the weekend. I feel like i need a drink in my hand while I watch football and play with the kiddos, so hoping this will help.
spadilly said:
Jumping in on this thread. Today makes it six days without a drink. Longest stretch I can remember in a while.
Made it through my first big test - out at a concert last night. Tonic water and lime instead of beer. It was cheaper and I felt better this morning after a late night than I normally do.
Loading up on cream soda, root beer, and topo Chico for the weekend. I feel like i need a drink in my hand while I watch football and play with the kiddos, so hoping this will help.
Sit on the floor with the kids and play with them. It is impossible to hold a drink!
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and not ready to throw all this out on a free forum but those of you with access can read here on ao. i would be over a year sober now but of course i had to learn the hard way. it was a good lesson to learn though. i initially got sober because i was tired of being miserable, after my relapse i am scared ****less of booze.
https://texags.com/forums/27/topics/2737325
and to make this health & fitness related, thanks to my sobriety and a need to fill down time i am now in better shape in my 30s than i have been since high school. even exchanged the booze for a six pack!
good luck to all who are responding and those just lurking and mulling it over. i've been there and please reach out if i can help in anyway.
https://texags.com/forums/27/topics/2737325
and to make this health & fitness related, thanks to my sobriety and a need to fill down time i am now in better shape in my 30s than i have been since high school. even exchanged the booze for a six pack!
good luck to all who are responding and those just lurking and mulling it over. i've been there and please reach out if i can help in anyway.
ruddyduck said:
and not ready to throw all this out on a free forum but those of you with access can read here on ao. i would be over a year sober now but of course i had to learn the hard way. it was a good lesson to learn though. i initially got sober because i was tired of being miserable, after my relapse i am scared ****less of booze.
https://texags.com/forums/27/topics/2737325
and to make this health & fitness related, thanks to my sobriety and a need to fill down time i am now in better shape in my 30s than i have been since high school. even exchanged the booze for a six pack!
good luck to all who are responding and those just lurking and mulling it over. i've been there and please reach out if i can help in anyway.
Great stuff Ruddy!
Just read that thread, Ruddy. Awesome.
I ALWAYS have a drink in my hand and it has to be in a koozie. I know it's weird to some but you're probably like me and you had a coldie in your hand no matter the task.
Water, soda etc. in my koozie in my left hand.
Old habits but better than passing out
Water, soda etc. in my koozie in my left hand.
Old habits but better than passing out
ruddyduck said:
and not ready to throw all this out on a free forum but those of you with access can read here on ao. i would be over a year sober now but of course i had to learn the hard way. it was a good lesson to learn though. i initially got sober because i was tired of being miserable, after my relapse i am scared ****less of booze.
https://texags.com/forums/27/topics/2737325
and to make this health & fitness related, thanks to my sobriety and a need to fill down time i am now in better shape in my 30s than i have been since high school. even exchanged the booze for a six pack!
good luck to all who are responding and those just lurking and mulling it over. i've been there and please reach out if i can help in anyway.
Very powerful stuff here, ruddy. Thank you so much for not being afraid to share your story. Keep up the good fight, brother!
What does everyone do with their chip?
I only have my 30 day chip but would like to maybe do something with each one as I earn them rather than stuff them on a drawer.
I only have my 30 day chip but would like to maybe do something with each one as I earn them rather than stuff them on a drawer.
Straight-up neck medallions......stick to the program and you'll have more bling than Flava Flav......
Ha! Heck yeah!
My father-in-law struggled with alcohol abuse and it was among the factors that led to his poor health and relatively young death. I can't pretend to understand how it feels to struggle with addiction--it's a big night if I have 2 drinks, and giving it up for pregnancies was easy--but I know my children barely met their grandfather and my husband and his brother didn't have the most involved dad they could have. I think those of you fighting this battle one day at a time are warriors, and your families are lucky for that.
Not quite the same thing, but my great aunt and uncle used to be heavy smokers and my doctor uncle flat-out told them if they didn't quit they'd never see their then-toddler grandkids finish high school. They quit and not only did the attend all 4 grandsons' high school graduations, but (sadly) survived one's passing and lived to watch the other 3 celebrate other life milestones including college graduation and a wedding. Quitting bought them not just more years, but better quality of life. It was the best gift they could give their grandchildren, and you're doing that for your families now.
Not quite the same thing, but my great aunt and uncle used to be heavy smokers and my doctor uncle flat-out told them if they didn't quit they'd never see their then-toddler grandkids finish high school. They quit and not only did the attend all 4 grandsons' high school graduations, but (sadly) survived one's passing and lived to watch the other 3 celebrate other life milestones including college graduation and a wedding. Quitting bought them not just more years, but better quality of life. It was the best gift they could give their grandchildren, and you're doing that for your families now.
Dang that is really impressive. I have a question: When you use to drink was it hard to take days off, i.e. If i drink Friday will you continue to drink on a daily basis, or was it more on the days you decide to drink you find it very difficult to stop?RickSawyer said:
400 days today!
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